Facebook Crusaders 

Words by Carmen Macri 

With great power comes great responsibility — and no one takes that more seriously than the keyboard warriors.

Welcome to the digital age, where online vigilantes thrive. You know the type: Facebook detectives and Twitter sleuths (and no, we’re not calling it X) who dig up decade-old receipts in the name of accountability. Sometimes it’s overkill … but sometimes, it’s exactly what’s needed.

They come in many forms, but today we’re zeroing in on the infamous Facebook groups. You know the ones; you join “just for laughs,” and next thing you know, it’s 2 a.m. and you’re 87 comments deep in drama you have no business caring about.

One group that’s been steadily gaining traction—brought to our attention by an avid “Folio” reader who figured we’d be into the tea—is Vote With Your Dollars Too NE Florida. A private Facebook group with over 1,500 members dedicated to “spilling the tea on owners and their business, along with politicians such as Ron DeSantis.” 

What does that mean? We’re so glad you asked. 

Dedicated Facebook crusaders do the dirty work — digging up the not-so-pretty pasts of business owners and local politicians who’d probably rather keep certain things under wraps. Once they’ve got the receipts, they post them for all to see, often naming names and tagging businesses. The post that pulled us in? A screenshot involving the owner of two well-loved bistros, who didn’t hesitate to spill the tea on a local meatball spot after a group member reached out. And this wasn’t hearsay — the owner of said meatball restaurant has a track record of racist, homophobic and transphobic posts that are still very much live.

Another infamous Jacksonville scandal — one that made waves statewide — is also mentioned in the group: the controversy surrounding a local bakery. If you, like us, were blissfully unaware, here’s the rundown: a few years back, during Pride Month, the bakery posted a tone-deaf message on social media that read, “Straight Pride: It’s natural. It’s worked for thousands of years, and you can make babies.”

Unsurprisingly, the post blew up for all the wrong reasons. The backlash was swift, and the bakery eventually issued a public apology. But for this group, the damage was done. The apology didn’t cut it. To this day, hundreds of people continue to boycott the business, receipts in hand and ready to remind anyone who forgets.

The group even takes it a step further, maintaining a running list of businesses to avoid due to so-called “problematic behavior.” In theory, it sounds helpful, especially when there are receipts to back it up. But dig a little deeper, and you’ll notice not every business on the blacklist has a scandal to its name. Some made the cut simply because the owner leans Republican. Suddenly, the line between accountability and political policing starts to blur.

But that’s an entirely different story on cancel culture, one we aren’t diving into just yet. 

Another infamous Facebook group that is all about airing out peoples’ dirty laundry is Are We Dating the Same Guy? Now, there are two versions of this gem: the Jacksonville page — heavily moderated, no slander, very tame (read: fairly uneventful) — and then there’s the Jacksonville/St. Augustine/NE Florida spin-off. That one is the Wild West. The moderation is looser, the stories are bolder and the women do not hold back. Screenshots, warnings and cautionary tales abound. It’s part community watch, part reality show, and it’s impossible to look away.

This group leans less political and more … recreational, though no less fascinating. Originally intended as a space for women to discreetly flag unfaithful partners, Are We Dating the Same Guy? has evolved into something much different. These days, it’s not so much about catching cheaters as it is about preemptive background checks. Women now post profiles of men they’ve matched with (sometimes before so much as a “hey’) seeking any tea, red flags or reputational breadcrumbs.

The comment sections? Think “Burn Book” but crowd-sourced and crowdsanctioned with a touch more digital permanence. It’s messy, oddly methodical and undeniably entertaining. 

As someone who’s had the distinct misfortune of spotting not one, but two exes (still very much in my contacts) featured on the page — complete with less-than-glowing reviews from other women — I can personally attest to its addictive quality. What started as mild curiosity quickly spiraled into nightly doomscrolling, not out of necessity but sheer, unapologetic entertainment.

Why do we find these types of groups so addictive?

Our brains are hardwired to chase that dopamine hit from watching strangers’ messy lives play out online. It’s like a never-ending, bite-sized reality show you can’t look away from. Take groups like Vote With Your Dollars Too — they don’t just dish dirt, they feed off that self-righteous rush that comes with boycotting businesses that don’t match your beliefs.

Neuroscientists found that watching drama lights up the same brain areas as real emotions. Seeing a fight or scandal triggers a dopamine rush—the brain’s pleasure chemical—the same one that fuels addictions to gambling, social media and even falling in love.