In the Name of Love — New Year’s Style


Words by Amy Love, matchmaker and founder of Honey & Flame 


Andie and Adam from St. Johns County asked:

“How do you help a partner who may be struggling with sticking to their resolutions, and how can couples motivate each other throughout the year?”


As we usher in a new year, many of us find ourselves contemplating resolutions and goals for the months ahead. For couples, this presents a unique opportunity not only for personal growth but also for strengthening the bond that ties them together. Let’s explore the delightful realm of relationship rituals, the challenges of sticking to resolutions, and how couples can embark on a journey of shared self-improvement for a fresh start.


In the spirit of a fresh start, couples can engage in meaningful rituals that symbolize renewal and growth. One timeless tradition is creating a vision board together. Gather magazines, scissors and a corkboard and spend an evening envisioning your goals and dreams as a couple. Whether it’s planning a dream vacation, starting a family or renovating your home, the act of visualizing your shared aspirations fosters connection and excitement for the future. If this sounds ridiculous to you, consider meditation together, or just share your personal inspiration Pinterest board. Don’t give up. There are lots of ways to put out your desires for the new year.  These aspirational thoughts will only help your person to be able to give you space to grow.


Another delightful ritual is crafting a “relationship time capsule.” Together, choose items that represent your current life stage and relationship dynamics. This could include handwritten letters to each other, a small trinket from a memorable date or a snapshot capturing a cherished moment. Bury the time capsule in your backyard and set a date to unearth it in the future, reminiscing about your journey together.


For those seeking a more immediate impact, consider a “relationship reset” weekend. Head to a serene location away from the hustle and bustle of daily life, where you can disconnect from routine and focus on each other. Engage in activities that bring joy, whether it’s hiking, cooking together or simply stargazing. Use this time to discuss your goals for the coming year and reaffirm your commitment to each other.


While the allure of New Year’s resolutions is undeniable, the challenge lies in sustaining the momentum throughout the year. Many folks find themselves struggling to adhere to their goals, and for couples, supporting each other through these ups and downs becomes crucial.


First, it’s essential to approach resolutions as a team effort. Instead of setting individual goals in isolation, identify areas where you can align your aspirations. For instance, if one partner aims to prioritize fitness, the other can join in for regular workouts or explore new healthy recipes together. This shared commitment not only enhances accountability but also transforms the journey into a shared adventure.


Communication is the cornerstone of overcoming resolution hurdles. If your partner is facing challenges, engage in open and non-judgmental conversations. Commit to active listening, empathetic understanding and expressing needs and desires openly. Explore the root causes of the struggle and collaboratively brainstorm solutions. Attend communication workshops or read relationship-focused literature together to enhance these skills. Perhaps adjustments to the goal are needed, or additional support from both partners can make the path more manageable.


Celebrating small victories is another powerful motivator. Break down larger goals into smaller, achievable milestones and acknowledge each other’s progress. Whether it’s a week of sticking to a workout routine or successfully managing stress, recognizing, and celebrating these accomplishments reinforces the commitment to growth.


Cultivating shared hobbies or experiences is another avenue for self-improvement as a couple. Whether it’s learning a new language, taking dance classes or exploring a shared passion, the process of discovering and growing together fosters a deeper connection.


In the realm of intimacy, consider setting goals that prioritize the emotional and physical connection between partners. This could involve scheduling regular date nights, experimenting with new experiences or simply dedicating time for heartfelt conversations that deepen emotional intimacy.


As we bid farewell to the old and welcome the new, let the spirit of a fresh start infuse your relationship with vitality and purpose. Whether through cherished rituals, supporting each other’s resolutions or embarking on shared self-improvement goals, the journey of growth as a couple is a celebration in itself. Here’s to a year of love, laughter and the joy of building a stronger, more resilient bond. Cheers to new beginnings!