Transformers: Dark of the Moon Movie Review

by Rick Grant
For this third in the series of Transformer movies, Michael Bay decided that more of everything was better–more battle scenes; more explosions; more citywide destruction; et al. Yeah, he figures that action junkies just can’t get enough of those autobots destroying each other and an entire city.
However, screenwriter Ehren Kruger threw in some cool references and those cute little autobots for comic relief. Leonard Nimoy is the voice of Sentinel Prime –the brains behind the plot to take over Earth and make humans slaves. Another standout in the cast is John Turturro as the eccentric billionaire, Simmons. Of course, hiring Francis McDormand (“Fargo”) as Mearing, who is in charge of the coming war with the autobots, was brilliant.
In her first film role, supermodel Rosie Huntington-Whiteley portrays Carly, Sam Witwicky’s (Shia LaBeouf) love interest. Director Michael Bay must have instructed Huntington-Whiteley to always look sexy no matter what was happening around her. Clearly, this babe followed his instructions precisely. Well, that’s what models do.
Deception and the art of the double-cross are the motivations behind the clunky autobots. Confusion abounds as to which side the humans are fighting. Toward the end of this loud and endless action movie, the script clears up any doubts about which race of intelligent machines is conning Dylan (Patrick Dempsey) who wants to be on the winning side to get even richer than he is already.
It all has to do with our landing men on the moon in 1969. A cleverly orchestrated back to the future montage opens the movie showing that the original Apollo moon mission was to investigate an alien space crash on the moon.
In a funny true-to-real-life story line, Witwicky graduated from college but can’t find a job, despite the fact that he was awarded a Presidential medal for his bravery in saving the Earth in the other two adventures. He ends up working for oddball Bruce Brazos (John Malovich).
Then, Witwicky meets his nemesis swine, Dylan who has been very friendly with his girlfriend, Carly. Hey, no time to be jealous as the autobots are on the move and Witwicky steps in again to save the Earth, much to the chagrin of Ms. Mearing.
As the battle for Earth ensues, Witwicky and Carly are in the middle of the fierce battles with giant autobots. Miraculously they never get a scratch or bad hair. The action scenes go on for an inordinate amount of time. But, Michael Bay is fulfilling his audience’s wildest fantasies as mayhem rules supreme.
Debris flies out into the audience via 3D and explosions happen every second. Yes, through all the bloody battles and destruction, Carly emerges looking fresh as a daisy. Movie magic strikes again.
I must confess, Huntington-Whiteley stimulated my dormant libido and the incessant action got my adrenalin flowing. In the end I was exhausted. So, if you only see one action movie this year, this is the one with more bang for the buck.


april, 2022