Letter-writing is becoming a lost art. Few people have a long-enough attention span to compose a relaxed, thoughtful report on what they have been doing and thinking. Meanwhile, the number of vigorous, far-reaching conversations is waning, too. Instead, many of us tend to emit and absorb short bursts of information at frequent intervals. But I invite you to rebel against this trend in the coming weeks.
Photographer Joel Leindecker can kick himself in the head 127 times in one minute. Guinness World Records affirms his achievement is unmatched. I’m begging you: Don’t try to top his mark any time soon. Don’t commit any act of mayhem, chaos or unkindness against yourself – even if it it’s done for entertainment purposes.
By the time we’ve become young adults, most of us don’t remember much about our lives from before the age of 5. As we grow into middle age, more and more childhood memories drop away. A few special moments keep burning brightly, but the early events that shaped us are mostly gone. Having said that, I want to alert you to the fact that you are in a phase when you could recover whole swaths of lost memories, both from your formative years and later.
Ludwig van Beethoven (1770-1827) was one of the greats. He was a prodigious composer, producing more than 350 works. One of the secrets to his high level of energy seems to have been his relationship with coffee. It was an indispensable part of his diet. He was fastidious in its preparation, counting out exactly 60 coffee beans for each cup.
“Pregreening” is a term for what impatient drivers do as they are waiting at a red light. They partly take their foot off the brake, allowing their car to creep forward, to establish some momentum before the light changes to green. I advise you to avoid this type of behavior in the coming week – both literally and metaphorically. Pregreening might make sense by, say, Nov. 15 or 16. But for now, relax and abide.
The scientific term for what happens when you get a headache from eating too much ice cream too fast is sphenopalatine ganglioneuralgia. Be on guard against such an occurrence in the coming week. Watch out for other phenomena that fit the description of being too-much-and-too-fast-of-a-good-thing. On the other hand, you shouldn’t worry at all about slowly getting just the right amount of a good thing. Enjoy your pleasures with grace and moderation; you’ll be fine.
Shape-shifting is a common fairy tale theme, says cultural historian Marina Warner in her book From the Beast to the Blonde. “A rusty lamp turns into an all-powerful talisman,” for example. “A humble pestle and mortar become the winged vehicle of the fairy enchantress,” or a slovenly beggar in a dirty donkeyskin transforms into a radiant princess. I foresee metaphorically similar events in your life soon. Maybe they’re already underway. Don’t underestimate the magic that is possible.
When a van on official business for the city of St. Paul, Minnesota, accidentally hit Megan Campbell’s Nissan Pathfinder in August, Campbell, naturally, filed a claim against the city for the $1,900 damage — normally just a cost of business for a city and one of about 400 claims St. Paul has processed this year.
The African nation of Swaziland has passed a law prohibiting witches from flying their broomsticks any higher than 150 meters above ground. That will be a big problem for Piscean witches. There is currently an astrological mandate for them to swoop and glide and soar as high and free as they want to.
Two physicists in Massachusetts are working on technology that will allow people to shoot laser beams out of their eyes. For Halloween, I suggest that you pretend you have already acquired this superpower. It’s time for you to be brash and jaunty as you radiate your influence with more confidence.