THE SPECKTATOR

My View on 'The View'

Bye-bye, Elisabeth. Hello, Grandma Lee?

Grandma Lee

Occupation: Stand-up comic

Why she would improve "The View": She's 79, smokes like a chimney, curses like a sailor and makes sex jokes about David Hasselhoff

Source: lasvegasmagazine.com
Sondra Todd (aka Momma)

Occupation: Female impersonator

Why she would improve "The View": Miss Jacksonville 2012, who refers to herself as a "fat, juicy bitch," could give the ladies make-up and fashion tips. And how awesome would it be if "she" had a wardrobe malfunction?

Source: facebook.com/sondra.todd.9
Julie Watkins

Occupation: Action News meteorologist and founder of The Girls Gone Green

Why she would improve "The View": An outspoken environmental, health and animal rights advocate, Watkins would certainly stir things up—especially during cooking segments. Pun intended.

Kerry Speckman
"Killer Lay"

Occupation: Member of the Jacksonville Roller Girls

Why she would improve "The View": Really, any of the Roller Girls could turn the "can't stand TV" into "can't miss TV" for me, but I especially like her team photo and her bio which references vodka, motor boating and her love of breaking kneecaps.

Source: jaxrollergirls.com
Kimberly Daniels

Occupation: Founder of Kimberly Daniels Ministries International, Spoken Word Ministries and World Bible College; author and Jacksonville Councilwoman, At Large, Group 1

Why?: Daniels can share her inspirational story of turning her life around (she's a former drug addict and prostitute) and why she doesn't buy candy during Halloween season (short answer: it's "prayed over by witches").

Source: kimberlydanielsministries.com
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Kerry Speckman shares her unique perspective and observations on people, places and events on the First Coast and beyond. She's also the 2012 winner of Jacksonville Dancing With the Stars, so she's got that going for her.

Contact Kerry by email or follow her on Twitter.

Elisabeth Hasselbeck barely had time to take the Mitt Romney posters (and Kathy Griffin dartboard) off her dressing room walls and remove her egg whites and energy bars out of the "The View" lunchroom before Jenny McCarthy started moving in.

With a Bankers Box full of anti-vaccine brochures, Razzie Awards and Gas-X, McCarthy is already making herself at home, which is great for maintaining the show's momentum. But I am slightly disappointed that no local women were even considered for the gig. Northeast Florida is full of sassy, opinionated women, many of whom have experience on TV and public speaking.

Take, for example, Grandma Lee: how entertaining would it be to watch the foul-mouthed, chain-smoking 79-year-old comic try and make it to the first commercial break without suffering nicotine withdrawals or dropping an "F" bomb—or 10? 

Check out all of my picks in the photo gallery above.

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